When one nitpicks, too much time is given to detail. We’re all frequently guilty, and I admit to being among chief sinners, particularly since the term’s initial usage began in 1956–the year of my Early High School graduation. Sudden thought: Maybe I’m the guy who first justified the term.

Like heat surging from “simmer to boil” on the cook stove, I’m revealing current “nitpicky” items that might confuse and confound, thus providing reason enough for me to expand and expound.

So steamed am I that I plan–at this time–to merely introduce some upcoming topics, a few of which may stretch into the dog days of summer, but perhaps through the cat days of spring. All told, little good seems likely to result from mounting negative “stuff,” but some of it has become volcanic. I’m sorry….

*****

Soon, I will review details of my visit to the oil change place whose TV ads boast that one woman’s visit was so brief, she didn’t have time to finish knitting her sweater, and a guy–chagrined that his oil change was finished so quickly–wasn’t able to finish garage door opener repairs. My recent experience varied greatly from the ads, as far as the east is from the west. Details later.

Let’s start today with packaging. A friend who helps us from time to time is not only a neatnik, but also committed to following instructions to the letter. Up front, I admit that this was my fault, entering “toothpicks” on the grocery list she’d fill. How was she to know that I have a thing about toothpicks? (I’m not sure why they even make flat ones, unless it’s an effort to utilize splinters that seem always destined to lodge or break off ‘tween our pearly whites.) After making sure she understood instructions for future toothpick purchases, I headed for the store to make the critical exchange.

She got the last laugh upon my admission of a “bone-headed” oversight after making the critical exchange of “flats” for “rounds.” (OK, I also purchased a few “final markdowns,” throwing the items into my cart, where my toothpicks had been tossed.) I had failed to notice that the flimsy box top was ajar, causing me to leave a trail of toothpicks–round ones, mind you–behind. Why can’t manufacturers add a piece of tape to avoid such blips? Maybe they expect most toothpicks to wind up on floors and pavement, never to reach our mouths. Accusing me of climbing over gates to save the hinges, our friend’s impish laugh lingered, now aware that I’m not only nitpicky, but also “toothpicky.”….

*****

It may seem that I am straddling the fence concerning public and private education in Texas. I’ve experienced both in higher education, and have good things to say about each, as well as for the K-through-12 world. If our public schools were properly funded, I’d find state funding for private schools more palatable.

Unthinkable to me is how state leaders–leaning on excellent “spin doctors” to promote their questionable positions–choose to ignore support of public schools, even after imposing costly mandates without additional state funding that’s been at a standstill since 2019. And we have more than $30 billion stashed away in Austin for “rainy day funding.” Memo to Austin: It’s flooding. Please let us know when we’re allowed to stop eating the cake you’re letting us have.

They can trot out all the stats they’d like, but many are mindful of a long-ago survey revealing that rail freight revenue was going down, and alcohol sales heading up. Yep, more people were getting loaded than boxcars. More later….

*****

Enough nitpicking. I join legions of others lamenting the homegoing of Pope Francis, whose humility and regard for the underprivileged were paramount.

Now, the cardinals must find a successor.

Any candidate named “Zacola” should withdraw, however.

“Pope Zacola” sounds like a soft drink….

*****

Dr. Newbury, a longtime speaker in the Metroplex, may be contacted at 817-447-3872 or newbury@speakerdoc.com. His column may be accessed at www.speakerdoc.com, where he reads it aloud, sometimes without stumbling.