“Let’s count!” Such a simple statement from a four-year old. How hard can that be? Well, with my four-year old, it gets a little out of hand. See if you can keep up.

On our way to dance class tonight, Kiera pipes up from the back seat, “Let’s count!”

“Ok,” replies her Daddy. “One…”

Kiera chimes in, “Two…”

Aaron takes his turn, “Three.”

“No. No.” Kiera says. “It’s Mom’s turn.” Ok, we will try again.

Aaron starts. “One.”

Kiera is next. “Two.”

Then it is my turn. “Three.”

“No. Mom, it is threeeee…” She responds dragging out the “e’s” at the end. I laughed but before I could say “three” I am reminded by the little angel in the back seat that we must start all over.

“One.” Aaron says.

“Two.” says Kiera.

“Threeeee…” I make sure to draw out the “e’s” at the end to please her. Obviously, I missed something in the initial instructions.

“No.” Kiera sighed. “Threeeeee… Daddy will go, then you and then me. Ok?”

At any moment, I expected a little man to pop up from the back seat with a clapperboard, shaking his head and scribbling Take 496 on the board.  After a couple more “takes” we managed to count to 24 and please Director Kiera. Thankfully, with the help of Sonic cheese sticks, she was appropriately distracted.

I often feel like I am living on a movie set and Kiera is the Director. Now, before any of you get the wrong idea, we don’t let her run our lives. She knows we are “the boss” as she calls it.

It’s just some days… like yesterday. One of the prizes that Kiera found from the Easter Bunny was a package of balloons. Not just any balloons, but the balloons that can be twisted into shapes and animals. Kiera and Aaron have had so much fun with these. One of the balloons became a sword.  Now back to Scene One.

I walked in my bedroom to change clothes, only to turn around to see a pink balloon sword pointed at my stomach.

“You must go to jail!” Kiera growled at me.  “You cannot escape! Now, sit down!” She motioned to my bed.

“Ok. Ok.” I surrendered and sat on the edge of my bed. She began moving backwards to my bedroom door waving her sword at me the whole time. Once she reached the door, she began to pull it closed. “Now, stay here!” With that order, she slammed my door. I sat for a few seconds before the door opened again.

She tossed the sword down on the bedroom floor. “Now, I am going to lose my sword. You need to pick it up after I close the door and try to escape. Cut the door.” Director Kiera instructed and then promptly closed the door.

Taking my cue, I bent over and picked up the sword. I started to the door, only for it to be opened again. Kiera yanked the sword away from me. “Ah-ha! I have the sword now! You cannot escape!” she yelled. “Now, you have to go sit back down and wait.”

I didn’t even get any lines that time! Can I at least get my name on my door with a star or maybe my own makeup person?

Well, I am off to bed. I have to get plenty of sleep for my close ups. Director Kiera never gives me much notice when we are on set.

Rowonna McNeely is a graphic artist for Willie’s T’s Screenprint & Embroidery.  She is a mother of a four year old girl and step mother of two adult girls. Her crazy life includes a dog, Sloane and psychotic cat, Gracie. Both females. She is married to her prince, who is outnumbered by the opposite gender.